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Togetherness Doesn’t Guarantee Success – You NEED To Rekindle “The Spark!”

One of the most “unexpected” effects of the recent quarantine may – or may NOT, depending upon your particular experiences – surprise you. Yes… many of us have put on the “Quarantine 15” weight… more of us, after staring at our four walls for days on end, have contributed to the sharp uptick in DIY and remodeling projects… and many of us have rediscovered the joy of cooking, hence those extra pounds. However, an increasing number of people have filed for DIVORCE after too much togetherness.

This could be attributed to a variety of factors, as diverse as the couples themselves. And for some, this may be counterintuitive – after all, shouldn’t all that “togetherness” make our relationships STRONGER?!?

Yet, all of that togetherness doesn’t necessarily speak to the QUALITY of the time. Let’s be honest… cleaning up the 18th spilled glass of juice, doing laundry when everyone else is asleep or watching TV, taking out the trash and recycling, or remembering to place your online order, are NOT romantic or “sexy” moments! Just because you’re under the same roof doesn’t mean you’re working on or improving your relationship.

Sometimes we need to make a conscious effort to bring the “sparkle” into those interactions with our partners. It reminds us of a favorite pop culture reference: Sex and the City! (Shocking, we know!) The second feature film drawn from the series – aside from the fact that Sex And The City: 2distinctly LACKED the “sparkle” of the first theatrical outing – had an interesting secondary storyline about Carrie and her husband, John (aka Mr. Big). With a couple of years of marriage under their belts, Carrie becomes increasingly frustrated with the complacency into which they’ve gradually slipped. After attending a social function and returning home, Carrie notes how he turned on his “sparkle” for a female party guest that evening, while she always seems to get the take-out-in-a-bag, sofa-lounging, sweat-pants version. And, she has a valid point.

Obviously, a number of misadventures occur between these early scenes, and the inevitable satisfying ending. C’mon it’s a movie! However, as we see each of our characters find their own happily ever after, we re-visit the earlier “issue” in Carrie and John’s marriage. And, even if the rest of the film might lack the snap-and-sizzle dialogue we’ve come to expect, this one line Carrie says makes it all worthwhile: “We’ve got to remember to always work on the ‘sparkle’!”

Of course, the big diamond he gave her during this scene certainly qualified as “sparkle.” But, we also knew what they were both REALLY talking about. And we all can take some notes from this idea. Don’t our significant others deserve some of the “sparkle” we might usually reserve for the “outside world”? Be truthful now, none of us is probably a picnic to be around ALLLLL the time!

It just seems like a good – and prudent – idea to bring a little “sizzle” as a part of your package (and “baggage”). And we all know, sometimes it only takes the tiniest flicker to re-ignite the “spark” in your relationship! Don’t underestimate the power of “little” things.

Surprise your partner by doing the laundry; quietly knock out a couple of things on that ever-present “Honey Do” list; do some quick meal-prep to have some snacks handy; cook a fabulous dinner AND clean the kitchen. Those “insignificant” thoughtful gestures don’t come with a Tiffany price tag, but can deliver equally-powerful “sparkle” to your relationship!

Consider this for some togetherness –  Light a fire in the backyard, set-up a blanket or a couple of chairs, bring out a tray with your preferred libation, and put into motion the perfect couples “escape.” Sure, it may not be Aruba or Banff, but just because you don’t pay luxe prices, doesn’t mean you can’t create a stellar moment. And, for that added “sparkle,” the OBVIOUS choice would be to incorporate some real sizzle! Now, what if you could get “little-blue-box” quality, industry-recognized, sparklers… at surprisingly affordable prices? No-brainer, right?!?

Whether a surprise bubble bath, with candles and sparklers, or a romantic dinner in with sparkling bottle service, and let’s not forget the “midnight-laundry-room-and-snack” sneak attack! Let your imagination run wild. And, if you hit a wall in your brainstorming, just give us a call or drop us an email, and we’re ready to with lots of ideas to help you put the “sparkle” back into your relationship!



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